I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
