it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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