If i come over, it means nothing
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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