Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
