Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
