If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
