They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
