I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Randomize
