remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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