she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
