I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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