I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
