I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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