Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
