i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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