I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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