Me too!
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
