I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
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