I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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