yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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