every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
found the other keg... it's in the tree
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
