Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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