i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
