is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize