I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
