I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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