you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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