My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
