I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize
