We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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