In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Do you still have your period?
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
