I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
