nut hugger
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
