so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize
