i jhust puked up my retainher.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
