No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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