you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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