i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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