You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
