I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i think my tv is drunk
That's when you crack a 10am beer
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize