It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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