I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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