whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
