I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
