Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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