I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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