Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
When are your genitals available?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
