I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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