Whod you bang
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
