playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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